Some days I take time for inner reflection and realize that I only have so much to give and I want to give to myself with that energy instead. It is important that I honor my boundaries and only give my time to people who "get me."
Conserving your spiritual energy is key to restoration
Conserving your spiritual energy is key to restoration. We shudder at the thought of the B word: Boundaries. We believe that other people won't function without our assistance. And if we get bare bones honest with ourselves it really isn't true. Do they need us or do we need them to be dependent on us so we can feel important or that we have purpose? What needs to change however isn't them, it is us... our reaction, our involvement and our investment level in them. It doesn't mean we do not care. It means that we are unwilling to compromise our emotional freedom to be enslaved to their traumatic demands. It means that they must evolve without you and oftentimes they need you to stop parenting them so that way they can grow. Our habitual offering to always be there for someone at the drop of a hat has its consequences. We become enablers to their emotions and often stunt their growth. As soon as you decide that you do not have to rescue them, you become free to bloom and grow yourself. I believe that it is the very same energetic freedom that also inspires long-lasting growth in others.
We would be worth nothing if we cannot save ourselves first
We've heard the oxygen mask theory, right? If you're in an airplane and the oxygen mask falls down the flight attendants are sure to remind you to always put yours on first before helping someone else. Why? Because we are worth nothing if we cannot save ourselves first. Many of us are guilty of this toxic hero mentality and it often translates into friendships, partnerships, families, and yes even in our workplaces. The thought comes through that if I don't do X, Y, or Z, it won't get done. The world will not blow up. But the reality is, that person WILL be okay. Your family must learn that they cannot use you for their emotional luggage bellboy/girl.
We are the gatekeepers to our energy and peace
We must work harder to be the best gatekeeper to our energy. Because we ARE the gatekeepers to our energy and peace. And just like you wouldn't give the key to your home to someone you barely know, we shouldn't surrender our valuable key (our time and energy) to those who have not proven they wish to add to our lives. If there is no contribution to your welfare and wellbeing, then they are the energy vampires of your life. And I don't know about you but I have too many damn dreams to let someone slow my journey or dull my sparkle.